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Poems

The bleeding sun

I saw the sun bleeding so much beauty
over the sea while it danced to the sound
playing in my head all day.

Like it listened, like it heard the struggle
I’m in. Like it understood that I needed peace.

I thought to myself – if the sea can be beautiful
in its riot of drops and waves than I can find
one thought that will keep me on my feet.

So much has happened and so much has
changed. Even the sun is disappearing from my
horizon. But soon after the moon rose and it
reminded me why I decided to share the name with him.

So strong even when he’s small. The only light
in the dark nights. He always finds a way to show
himself, no matter how many times he disappears.

Inspire me and revive me. Give me new
meaning and lead me. Moon, you messenger
that there is always something good to be found
even in the darkest night, help me sleep tonight.

Life exhausted me and left me sitting on this
beach and I feel alone but that’s alright because
I’m looking at the sun bleeding so much beauty over
the sea and setting the territory for the moon to share some
light upon the lost.

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Poems

Made-up love

I have these memories of you holding
my hand and laying by my side. I remember you
running to my house late at night when I
wasn’t feeling alright.

Do you know what it feels like when you
create a perfect love in your mind and then
you snap out of it and realize you were just
daydreaming?

I took a cold shower to get a hold of myself.
Every single drop on my skin screamed: Why
are you such mess, wake up from wonderland!

Where am I going? – I don’t know. The only thing I’m
sure of is that I got to get over somebody who was
never mine. I was running in a circle of letting myself
down and obviously I thought I was running a marathon.

I’ll just avoid seeing you in real life because I forgot
how to differ my reality from the world outside. I’ll
spend another night dreaming about you and then
I’ll find the courage to say: Goodbye, my made-up love

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Poems

What can love do

What can love do when I was your mistake?
What can love do when one loves and to the
other one it’s all the same?
What can love do when she goes away?
What can love do if it lost its way?

When the silence steps in you only feel
the walls of this room coming closer to you
and there’s no way out. When you can’t go back
and you feel trapped tell me so I know – what can
love do when I don’t feel the same about you?

There is nothing here, no pain and no fear.
Every feeling just disappeared out of my reach.
What can love do when my heart doesn’t beat the same?
I don’t want to hurt you and bring you pain but I
see that every time I’m near you want to burst into tears.

Tell me where to go and tell me what to do. Tell me
how I can make it up to you! I know I broke you to pieces but
please show me what turn I am supposed to take so you don’t
have to see my heartless face again.

All the roads are empty and dark, full of sadness
and there are no guidelines, there is nothing here. Guess
that emotionless shells like me don’t know what the right way is.
Guess I don’t know what right or wrong is since I let you slip
between my fingers and you are the best thing life gave me.

Once again I want to say I’m sorry, you deserve someone
capable of love, someone that’s not like me.
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Poems

I’m a soul

It’s like I was stripped down naked
and placed in a shop-window to be criticized.
They’re finger pointing and pressing me
into fitting their measurements like
they carry the whole world in their hands.

They captured good life and people’s will
into their superficial world. We can’t even
walk out without being told that our appearance
doesn’t fit in with their rules.

What scares me the most is the thought
that they are society and we are a part of it.
We created it just so we could become self-destructive,
abusive dictators of misery.

‘’What you see is all there is’’ became our politics.
We’re desperately trying to design everything and
make ourselves all look like empty mannequins.

We don’t know how to say ‘’They can go to hell
I’m doing this for me’’ because we are too busy
trying to blend in.

If they manage to get to me I’ll just repeat:
‘’I have a body but what I am is a soul.’’

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Poems

Fight

You’ll kill yourself trying to fit in,
working a double shift just to pay rent.
Study on the break, got to get those
good grades it’s not like you can buy knowledge.

You’re going to put in your best, hoping
somebody realizes the talents you have
while others just get what they want without
having to move a single bone. It’s not
like there is any problem money can’t erase.

Some of us were born to work and never stop.
It’s not like we got our lives laid out in front us.
This struggle is our all so embrace it, hold onto it,
it’s not like there’s much choice.

You will fall and you will cry but you
will get back up and you will climb. Life didn’t
give you anything you can’t put up with so be proud
of yourself for making it this far. Here comes another
round – FIGHT!

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Poems

Love remains

Silence! Don’t you understand?
Sometimes we don’t need words.
Silence! Don’t you realize?
Silence is my soul’s relief now.
Silence! Don’t you feel it?
You’re carrying our love’s remains on your lips.

Everything we had is a memory now.
Why even try, we ran out of time.
Everything burned down, everything is ash and
everything is swallowed by this great dark.
The only thing I hear beating in the corner of this room
are the remains of love.

Why? Give me an answer!
When did everything crash down?
Why? Tell me the truth!
Why did you go without saying goodbye?
Why? Explain it to me now!
Why did you sell me all those lies?

Don’t look for me anymore, I got lost in
that dark place called the past. They call me crazy,
they call me insane, they call me the collector
of love remains.

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Poems

Advice

You hide a tear with a smile.
Everything around you turned grey.
Everywhere you look, you see clones.
Slaves of imposed perfection.

Nobody wants to be who they are but
you should demand to be loved for you and
don’t settle for anything less. Your looks don’t
make you pretty, the important is within.

Victory and defeat, happiness and sadness
They are a part of life and don’t dodge them,
rather make the best of everything. Don’t look
away, don’t hide yourself, you’re here for a reason.

Whatever they say, you ignore.
Head up, smile and go on.
Life is a ride that you will miss if you keep
standing scared on the sidewalk.

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Poems

Little girl

In some nights the stars disappear.
They get covered by clouds and the sky
looks empty like I.
Outside there is a smile on my face but inside
emptiness took its place.
I know I’m not in this alone, but still I can
never find a safe home where my thought
would collide with somebody else’s and then
I wouldn’t be alone.

I’m walking down the lane of life
and every new step is a new year gone by.
I’m getting older and older but in my shadow there is
still that little girl. She takes a part of my burden when I
can’t take it anymore. She brings me back to life
when I think all hope is lost. She helps me forget, but she
is wishful thinking.

She wants her childhood back but she is powerless.
I see her. After every fall she still screams and fights
no matter what. Nobody else sees her and feels her struggle.
She is my reflection every time I look into a mirror.
I am just like her, invisible. Everyone is looking at me
but they don’t see me, the real me. But still I’m walking down
the lane of life.

I believe. I hope. I dream. I live. I guard my little girl
in the shadow because she is the only one that reaches out
for me when stars become tears.

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Poems

Slap for a hypocrite

Don’t teach me how to live and don’t
sell me that crap how everything is unfair
because I already know it.
If i get in trouble I’ll find my way out,
I don’t need your help.
Don’t play the boss in this game, because
whenever you rule I lose aim so just
let me do things my own way.

Even if you see me at the bottom keep
your hand to yourself. I’d rather crawl on the ground
than reach for you hypocrite help. Life’s a work of art
and you’re turning it to shit. Even if you hear me scream
don’t come near because it isn’t a call for help.

Now you’re all rainbows and sunshine, 5 minutes
ago you were tearing down the whole town just to get
what you want.
Rather tell me what you want right now and don’t
invade my space with your filthy presence.

Go to the eight circle of hell from where you crawled
out of and stop pretending like I’m not onto your game.
Next time you stop by the only thing you’ll feel is my front door
slammed into every one of your hundred faces.

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