Poem #33

They say you learn something from every experience.
It’s true and I learned a lot about you and
how you were no good for me and how you
only love yourself and how I would have only
suffered around you.
Regardless, I want to tell you that I threw that
knowledge away like an old math book and I’m
giving you one more chance to come back because
they also say: Repetitorum est mater studiorum.

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Poem #7

I don’t feel like loving you anymore.
I grew very much tired of it.
If only I could take a shower and
sleep through it. My eyes and my body
then might catch a break but I cannot
command my weary heart to rest.

 

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Poem #6

I am holding on to you  because I think
low of myself. I don’t believe anyone will
want me after you, I am scared that moving on
means being left alone. That’s probably what makes
me believe love is what we have.
Strange.
No love story ever described it as something
so twisted and painful.

 

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Poem #5

I don’t need to hear that you love me.
I need you to show it to me.
I don’t need you to tell me fairytales.
I need to live them with you.
I don’t need you to be here because you think
it’s the right thing to do.
I need you to choose me before everyone else
and be here because you want to.

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Poem #4

I hold you responsible for everything.
You kept your secrets to yourself, tried your
best to get into my bed while you were in someone
else’s as well and I was the fool that let you in.
Now I need you to undo what you have done to me.

Go to the night when we talked, I had my legs
over your knees and unkiss me. Go to the night
you first slept next to me and unhug me. Go to
every single day we spent together and untouch me,
unfeel me, untell all those sweet things when you
already unloved me.

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Poem #3

Your same old story about how you didn’t
want to hurt me is getting me angrier by the
minute because I stopped believing it as soon
as I saw that homewrecking message on your phone.
Just grow a pair for a moment and tell me how
long have I been sharing a bed with both you and her.

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Poem #2

Just for tonight stay here and don’t make
a sound. Let your eyes tell me what you can’t
and let your body move to the music of mine.
In the morning we’ll become strangers again,
pretending like we don’t hold each other’s hearts
in our hands.

 

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Poem

I thought of calling but my fingers
couldn’t dial the number.
I thought of sending a message, but
I just couldn’t find the words.
I thought of sending you one of my poems
but I know you wouldn’t appreciate it the way
you didn’t appreciate me.

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Forever and never

Today I’m locking our memory in a box
in my mind and I’ll give one key to you
if you would like to have it. I can’t get rid
of these feelings but I can contain them.
We will be together forever and never, together and apart.

Somewhere in the mind we will create a place that
will be completely ours and there we will live out a
life ‘till we’re old but we will never again hold hands,
kiss during a movie, spend sleepless nights together.

Even if I had a chance I would never come back to your
arms again because I can’t go through this again.
I prefer our Neverland.
I prefer you stay my forever and never, together and apart.

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I’m running a mile

I’m running a mile for every stupid thing you said.
Guess I will be running forever. The ground under me
are all the lies, regrets and memories, the air surrounding me
is healing the wounds and erasing the misery…

Running a mile

Lately I started to think about running again. Back in high school I loved running, especially morning runs and when I moved to Zadar my first apartment was near the beach so I ran a few times there. It was my big passion because it gave me clarity and eased my mind so I think I’ll probably come back to this habit.

Check out the whole poem clicking here

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