Lately I’ve been feeling really guilty because I wasn’t putting so much effort in my blog as I used to and also The Poetry Bar has been suffering due to my lack of work. Since I feel a really strong attachment to this blog and I am so grateful to all of the people following me I just felt like I should explain myself.
To be honest, in the last few weeks I haven’t been putting much effort into anything. I just let time pass by, I stopped taking care of myself and it has made me feel completely drained of energy and motivation to work. Actually, I feel like a really big hypocrite because of it since I’m always preaching about self-care and putting yourself first when you need to and I haven’t been doing that lately. The consequences of my behavior are visible on my lack of work on the blog and The Poetry Bar and on my health since I’ve gained weight, been ill lately, started smoking again etc. I’ve been having some issues in my personal life that had a really big impact on me and the only person I am blaming for it is myself and not the people involved because I know that I know better than to have such a negative and self-destructive response to problems.
That’s pretty much it. I am just drained and exhausted. I promised myself to take better care of my health, both mental and physical – actually I am committing to it before things get worse. I hope you all understand and I hope that you don’t hold a grudge because I didn’t post as much, answer to all of your comments and emails. Thank you so much for being here and for reading this and if you are going through something similar I hope that maybe this text has helped you realize that you too need to focus on yourself more. Please do send more of your works to The Poetry Bar so that we can get it up and running again and as soon as I get some more inspiration I will post more work.
Have a lovely rest of the week!
Sending love and positive vibes,
Happy International Women’s Day to all of you wonderful, strong, powerful, beautiful women! I just want you to know that I want you to always be ambitious, strive for happiness and fight for yourself. Live life at your own terms and don’t let anything or anyone define who you are. Your worth can’t be measured. I hope you all have a great day and a great weekend.
My Women’s Day started yesterday actually. I celebrated a little with my boyfriend and today he woke me up with a surprise flower delivery to my door and I just can’t seem to erase this smile off of my face. This evening I am going out with my girl Isabella. We have a table at our favorite bar and a bottle that’s going to make us make fun decisions and good memories. Love you all, have a great day!
I realized it’s been a while since I posted something about my life, things I do and so on and, after doing some analysis on my previous posts, it came to my attention that you actually liked those posts, commented a lot so I decided to do one more again.
It won’t be a very elaborate post or contain a lot of pics but there’s a good reason for that. I spent the weekend after Valentines with my boyfriend in Opatija. Opatija is a beautiful city on the Croatian coast, one of the most beautiful to be honest. The weekend was great, we stayed at a nice hotel, went to a nice restaurant, took a long walk along the beach and all of that stuff couples do on Valentines. I don’t have a lot of pictures because my caveman boyfriend hates taking pictures and doesn’t even own any type of social media account. I mean, good for him and his mental health, but bad for me as a blogger. Just kidding, I actually admire him for being so, how should I say, “offline”.
Here are literally the only pics from the weekend I have, some of the were Instagram stories so they will have the location tag or something. Tell me now, have you ever visited Croatia?
And of course, the dress I had on during our night out.
Hey there little sleepy girl!
Tonight daddy didn’t fall asleep on the curb.
He is home, punching mom, breaking stuff, cursing hard.
Be a good girl as mommy said and hide under
the bed, hope you won’t end up dead.
Hey there little sleepy boy!
One day you will grow so strong. So strong you will
defend them all, like a superhero punch daddy through the wall.
Be a good boy as mommy said and pray daddy won’t
fall asleep with a burning cigarette in his hand.
Hey there little sleepy kids!
Your window is on the second floor, easy to jump, maybe
break one bone. You’ve already done it twice, what’s some more?
Now close your eyes like mommy said, tomorrow is a brand new
day for you to listen mommy explain how again she fell down the stairs.
So guys I need some advice from you. Since I quit my studying of Italian and Spanish at the University I have been trying my best to keep in touch with the languages. Learning a foreign language is like growing a new muscle and you have to practice it if you want it to stay in shape.
I need all of you from the Spanish, Italian and Portuguese speaking countries to give me some recommendations on books and movies and TV shows I should read/watch. If you also speak those languages and have some recommendations just write them down, it will be so helpful to me.
I have been reading one book in Italian from Mauro Corona, I have been listening to a whole bunch of Spanish music and I have been watching a Portuguese TV show on Youtube but I need some more and honestly I need something interesting and contemporary and who better to help me than you guys!
Thank you sooooo much for your attention and I can’t wait to see what recommendations you will send my way!
Sending love and positive vibes,
This lovely post was actually a comment made by Poet of the Light under my post I found a typewriter! I was so amazed and overwhelmed with this that I just wanted to share it with all of you. It really got to me because it includes my story of coming home and finding this typewriter… Poet of the Light just hit the nail on the head. I honestly hope Poet of the Light isn’t upset I’m publishing this.
Make sure to check out his blog: https://poetofthelight.com/
Here it goes:
She secretly wore doubts of her choice to return the home of her mother the way any battle ridden warrior does when going back to familiar landscape, the touch of yesterday’s long missed memories and even the conversation over a home cooked meal by Mama. Life can be funny that way, with its secret ingredients found nowhere else. It had been nearly a month when her eyes finally caught site of that- most peculiar contraption sitting off to the side. It was as if the universe rippled in correction, the kind most don’t even notice. One could pose the argument; it was as if destiny was at play here, and that typewriter had been waiting- in silence all this time like a shooting star waiting to be infused with life, life that could only be bestowed from Luna’s fingerprint. Much the way small young girl dreams of being saved by a handsome prince and kissing her back to life; that typewriter certainly could be said to have played the same role, as her dashing prince, except she was the savior and the lost soul and sleeping heart- was her own…damaged by an unwritten travesty. All she had to do was remove the undersize cloth somewhat protecting it from ghostly cobweb collection.
After cleaning it up and preparing it for the test, transformion of old dry stale air into a flow of beautiful inked words- suddenly permeated the surroundings of her essence as she began pouring out her heart, her subdued feelings and long hidden dreams. Only she could read her words on invisible paper taking down all she stroked. Every torn scar on her heart slowly disappearing from her divine heart and her memory as time was erasing her unwanted pain. The sounds of the key strokes striking parchment was a symphony written an eon before her birth and even time itself had to wait until that angelic touch from the soul of Luna infused life and color to each phrase, each word- every single letter. Every typed mistake was planned as part of this written marvel, as too was every tearful correction, making it her life renewed in fluid motion.
Luna was meant to find that antiquated collection of steel that collected dust of past darken hours, that still worked like some enchanted time machine taking Luna herself back to the old Luna of yesteryear, that same Luna born with mystery and magical hope alive and well in her eyes as her heart pumped out love that like the ink scent adrift in the room where she can be heard clacking away secrets for the universe to bequest and unfold at the promise of every new dawn morning like every virginal flower bursting in a bathe of dew. The kind of secret love recipes Mam’s cook, that changes the world for the betterment. Oh- how I dream to be reborn as her parchment and flooded with the love of…Luna’s ink.
Since yesterday, I have been crazy ecstatic about a little discovery I made. Look at this beauty!
My mother completely forgot to tell me that there was a typewriter in our apartment. I moved back home more than a month ago and I didn’t know it was here. It was actually at the bottom of MY NIGHTSTAND. I was cleaning up my room and just organizing some things I was postponing and then I just noticed this green case, pulled it out and found this beautiful typewriter there.
I remember commenting about it on Twitter with one of the poets I follow and we were actually talking about writing books on old typewriters. I don’t know how much do you believe in signs but I think this might be a sign I should start writing my first book because I’ve been talking about it for ages. I think this is the sign. I am still so happy about finding this typewriter. Tell me if you believe in sign and if you own one of this typewriters.
Hope you all are having a wonderful Sunday. I will be working, but I had a great Saturday and I had two days off so I’m feeling full of energy to do this shift today. Make sure to tell me what you have been up to lately, what’s new with you and, obviously, send some more work for The Poetry Bar.
Sending love and positive vibes,