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My Own Medicine

I’ve had these lines running through my head.
Don’t know if they were thoughts or demons
messing with my brain but I knew I had to put them
to rest. I had to put them on a piece of paper.
I’m taking my own medicine.

My hands got weak, my legs weren’t able to hold
me anymore. I got lost because fog fell on the path
I was on but the fog was actually my mind clouding
everything I was supposed to be focused on.

Rule #1 The only thing standing between you
and who you want to be is work so get started.

I thought help could be found in someone else,
in something else but I was just wandering around
this empty place alone. I neglected the fact that I’m
my plan A and B.

Rule #2 Work for yourself, on yourself, by yourself

It seemed like everyone just had it better than me.
I hated life for throwing crumbs of it’s table in front
of my feet. While I was busy hating on the world for
advancing while I was standing I forgot that the crumbs
used to be enough to built something up.

Rule #3 Powerful people know how to appreciate their
success and don’t have the need to compare it to
someone else’s just to get validation that they’re better

Everything was spinning out of control and I became
a damn tornado that destroyed everything I used to have.
I blamed everyone, I blamed everything but I forgot that only
I was the responsible for the mess I called life.

Rule #4 If you feel everything is wrong don’t try to change
everything. Change yourself, change your mind.

Feet move! Hands work! I’ll yell at myself until I find
the strength to pull this through. It’s playing hide and seek
in my mind but I’ll find it, own it and use it to make
myself what I used to be.

Rule #5 Be your own hero.

I’m done with listening, I’m done with insecurity.
if I fall, it’s on me. If I rise, I’ll thank me. Time to do the
impossible and believe that my acts will sum up to
a better thing. I’m just believing what’s within.

Rule #6 Do it for yourself, not for acknowledgment

I’ll take my own advice, I’m taking a taste of
my own medicine. It tastes like regret, it tastes like
pain, it tastes like misery but I’ll put up with it.
I’m being me after a long time of wandering
A new era begins.

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Categories
Poems

Made-up love

I have these memories of you holding
my hand and laying by my side. I remember you
running to my house late at night when I
wasn’t feeling alright.

Do you know what it feels like when you
create a perfect love in your mind and then
you snap out of it and realize you were just
daydreaming?

I took a cold shower to get a hold of myself.
Every single drop on my skin screamed: Why
are you such mess, wake up from wonderland!

Where am I going? – I don’t know. The only thing I’m
sure of is that I got to get over somebody who was
never mine. I was running in a circle of letting myself
down and obviously I thought I was running a marathon.

I’ll just avoid seeing you in real life because I forgot
how to differ my reality from the world outside. I’ll
spend another night dreaming about you and then
I’ll find the courage to say: Goodbye, my made-up love

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