Poem #332 – Purge

You wake up with nausea and dizziness
but not with the will to wake up.
Go through the day not feeling like yourself,
you are selling your soul to the devil and that
devil is the world you are trapped in.
At night, before bed, you are in the shower for hours.

You are trying to purge the sin from your body with water
as if you just stepped out of a Bible while in reality
you have been questioning the existence of God
for years now. You turn the water off, your body is burning
but for a moment there you feel clean.
You promise yourself that in the morning it will be better.

You wake up with nausea and dizziness
but not with the will to wake up.
You are already late so you do not have time to
have a shower to see if the magic works in the morning as well.
You slap on a smile to avoid the questions, not realizing
this fakeness is eating away at your soul.

The poet inside of you invites you to write the feelings down,
he whispers in your ear that they are bottled up.
So you try to purge that thing out of your body with
words and verses for yourself or for the world to read,
laugh at, call you crazy because of that.
But for a moment there, it empties your mind.

It’s all for moments, nothing lasts.
You cannot purge something rotten that grew inside.
You can only heal it but you are too weak from trying
to purge it out as if a broken heart can be purged.
You are just tired and want to close your eyes
but the demons never sleep.

Poem #331

Just come home.
This is not in a selfish way, I am not
asking you to come back to me.
I am asking you to come home. 

To the home that doesn’t have a roof
or 4 walls.
To the home where you feel safe, 
no matter where it is.
Just come home. 

The lines and the smoke won’t 
ease that mind. You need to come home.
There is safety in the light,
there can be peace in the dark.
Just come home. 

Poem #330

I do not need you.
I have been through hell and back,
got out by myself.
I shower in burning hot water
to make my skin remember of how
much I am capable of.

I do not need you.
I learned the hard way to stand
on my own two feet.
My knees still bleed, the bruises
pulsate but it doesn’t stop
me from getting up every day.

I do not need you. I want you.
I want you to kiss every wound,
touch every weakness.
You look like you are smart
enough to know what type of
blessing that is.

Poem #328

If your soul craves art
like your body craves air
it means that he stole your peace.

You let him tear down the walls
of your museum and destroy
your books and paintings and melodies

Don’t follow him into the dark.
Let him have those ruined paintings,
ripped out book pages and distorted melodies.

You are strong enough to build a new masterpiece.

Poem #327

We were more toxic than this
cigarette between my fingers
Like a good addict I am still
looking for those eyes
that loved to undress me.

My mind is silenced.
My heart is twisted.
I wonder is it human to crave
poison while I lie awake,
a bit drunk with smoke in my lungs
waiting for you to come back.

Poem #326

We aren’t of those who want
to conquer the world.
We would build one ourselves.
But what is that good for if
we are playing the hurting game?

Who is going to let his trauma
win over love first?
Which one is going to self-destruct
and turn us into dust?

You need to know how to read
minds to know what I am saying.
I need to threaten to leave
to get an ounce of your attention.

Maybe it isn’t our fault we
are too messed up to love?

We reached 5k followers

Hello everyone!

Yesterday we reached a milestone. There’s 5000 of you on this blog. I actually couldn’t believe when I saw it because I don’t really keep track of the numbers on the blog, I enjoy much more reading your comments, seeing how much you engage in The Poetry Bar and them BOOOM. 5k followers.

I think this is an important milestone for all of us and I just hope we will continue to grow, comment, share content and support each other now more than ever.

Thank you so much for everything and thank you for helping our community grow ❤

I hope I will soon see more of your lovely guest posts for The Poetry Bar, #savingme and The Positivity Press which is active during these difficult times.

If you are new here, you can read more about our guest posts in our Guest Post Information.

I am getting back to my job now and just want to thank you all one more time!

Sending love and positive vibes,
Luna

Poem #325

When I yell, it’s not because I am angry
It’s because I care.

When jealousy paints me a shade of green
it’s not because I don’t trust you
It’s because I am scared of losing you.

When I have an attitude and say what I don’t mean
it’s not because I want to push you away.
It’s because I am trying to get your attention.

My soul gets lost in the unsaid just
like my fingers in your hair.
Learn to read between the lines,
that’s where poet’s heart lies.

Once silence steps in, the lines will go away
and so will I.

Poem #324

You don’t even know I was raised in a world
where showing weakness gets you killed
which is why you are still surprised I am
unable to let you inside.

You hit me up after midnight when
I am already drowned in my nightmares.
You come and go like waves and let me
fall deeper into my denial.

I need to know you are here
to stop my mind from terrorizing me.
But even when you slam the door when you leave
you won’t hear me say: Stay.

I will just hide in my shell.