Holding on

“You are so quiet and brave
I sometimes forget you are suffering”

I see you staring just a little longer
At reflections of yourself in strange places
You walk past carnivals of joy
Like they are alien to your world
I hear you press your hands to your mouth
Trying to shove the screams back inside
But a sob and a half escapes your restraint
And you wonder what went so wrong

You look out the window into the rainy sky
Gaze fixated on a swinging branch
Thoughts feed on your sanity
Your heartbeat’s a muffled drum
You can’t look into her eyes for too long
Fearing you might soak in her pain
And your empathy might just be tossed
Recklessly around the way

You hold flowers in your palms
Like they are a piece of your body
And you cannot afford to lose another
To the cruel ways of the world
All you have known is unkept promises
Half-baked smiles and awkward hugs
You’ve waited too long for things to get right
But everything you do seems to reset the pain

You walk the earth with effortless composure
But inside, you’re shards of glass
Crumbled like an old tissue
Back crouched against closed doors
I see you gathering yourself together
Before walking out into the light
You punch holes into stone walls
And don’t care to stop the bleeding

“You are so quiet and brave
I sometimes forget you are suffering”

Hey there! I am Mrudula Kulkarni from India. I study architecture and am forever inspired by scenic places.
I post my work on https://mruduladotkulkarni.wordpress.com
I post some of my visual work on Instagram at @why.am.i.typing.this

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