Women don’t owe you anything

I started making Tiktoks, we all new this day would come. I have been wasting my youth on that app for a while now and believe it’s time to be an active patient in the Tiktok plague. 

So, my FYP very often hits the spot of my anger and a video of some fitness coach ended up there and he was making fun of this girl (the way she talks) and gave his toxic stance on women rejecting men. I made a response video to it, please watch it because I made some questions there that I would really like some answers to.  

Is there a way to tell insecure, potentially dangerous men that you are not interested? Is a restraining order what it takes for some men to understand that women don’t want them around? 

I don’t think that all men are like this. I have had my experiences with both sides of the spectrum but unfortunately, men like this ass in the video make it extremely hard for women to trust men and makes us always act as if all men might assault us. Better safe than sorry, what can I say. 

In his video he also yells about how if you cannot approach a woman in daylight, are you supposed to approach her when she is at the bar, drunk and cannot make two coherent sentences. You can approach a woman both during the day and during the night, as long as you are respectful about it, know your fucking place and know that no means no. Very simple. 

I did not care much for him using “drunk girl in a bar” as an excuse to justify his toxic, harmful opinions. He, intentionally or unintentionally, implied that there’s no reason to talk to a drunk woman in a bar with the intention of meeting her or asking her out but that you should only talk to a drunk girl if you have sex on your mind. He did not say it like that, but that’s what I heard. It was between the lines. 

Once a guy hit on me while I was out with my friends, there were drinks involved and all he did was try to talk to me, I ended up giving him my number, he did not try to take advantage of the situation and he actually ended up being my boyfriend despite meeting me while I was drinking with my girls.  

There was another guy who also saw me in a bar when I was partying with my friend (ahhh, the pre-covid times). He didn’t come and talk to me but he did find me on IG by going through all the pics people posted on IG tagging that bar and contacted me by writing “Did you and your friend have fun at the bar”. A man I did not know contacted me out of the blue and asked me did I have a good time last night in the bar. Do I really have to say how that story ended? 

It isn’t where you meet a girl you like, it’s how you actually approach her. And if that girl is at Target, getting snacks, minding her damn business, not in the mood to talk to anyone it’s her absolute right to fucking do that.  

Women you do not know, do not owe you anything.  

God, that video pissed me off. 

I love you, 

8 thoughts on “Women don’t owe you anything

  1. I have to figure out how to unfollow people.

    1. Go to your reader, under “following” click on the three dots next to the blog post in the reader and unfollow who you want to unfollow 🥰

      1. Oh no…he took offence thinking this post was about him. Seriously…we can’t even have a conversation about how “some” men behave like this so it causes women to worry about “all” men. When will men realise it isn’t women causing this distrust against men. It’s men themselves. The crap “some” men do make women worry that “all” men do. Seriously guys, don’t take it personally and if you don’t like this sort of behaviour start telling your friends/coworkers/bosses/family/strangers to stop when you see it happening! If you ignore it, you make the problem worse.

  2. I never understood the “bold” men acting like asses to attract women (or the internet trolls). Perhaps they were not properly guided by their parents while they were growing up or perhaps they think they are just being cute or smart. Either way, maybe they need to ask themselves, if I was a woman, would I go out with me? If the answer is no, you are being an ass.

  3. I’m glad I’m old and all this is behind me.
    It seems that common courtesy and manners are forgotten attributes for a lot of people and they just moved straight to creepy.

  4. As another older man I have seen many changes in the ways that men and women meet over the years. In my teen years we met at youth groups and then in our workplaces. Ten years later my younger sister met fellows at a popular bar on a Thursday night. Years later, bars and nightclubs are still meeting places, but also we now have social media and all of that. I’m so glad I don’t need to look for anyone in those ways. If I found myself alone again I would still seek out someone in one of the many communities that I am part of, such as my photography clubs, where I know people have shared interests with me.

  5. Love your response video. Toxic masculinity is a blight on our species, and it makes me ashamed. I’ve followed your TikTok. (TheBick1958) I’m still fairly new to it, so all I’ve done, so far is scroll and follow a few. One of these days, I’ll create one. If I can figure out how.

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