There’s so much confusion in me
because on that day a lightning struck
from the sky and divided me in half.
It’s like my soul is trying to maintain balance
while it’s being torn apart by two extremes of my character.
On one hand I want to forgive him,
I understand there were circumstances that made him this way
but the other hand would gladly keep his head under water
to get revenge for everything.
The skeletons were never in the closet,
it was a house of bones.
I believe I left some of my own behind
when I ran away to save my sanity.
What if this chained beast chews its way to freedom
and becomes even more rabid after years of being fed
nothing but silence and repressed memories?
I swear I saw my own face move in the mirror while I stood still.
I feel like a ticking bomb.
This is what being a child expected to be the bigger person does to you.
It splits you right down the middle,
forces you to control yourself to exhaustion
makes heaven and hell reside in your mind
without making room for any grey area.
#savingme is the community where abuse victims can publish their experiences just to let go and find comfort and support. Maybe it doesn’t feel like much but just publishing your story for others to read makes you strong. You can send your story about the abuse you went through to firstname.lastname@example.org and you can choose if you want it to be anonymous or not.