Aren’t you getting tired of this crisis you have been in for the past 5 years? All of the time questioning what you should do and where should you be and where you are in life….
Where you are?!
You are in your own damn way. Nobody is holding you back in life. You are holding yourself back. Successfully, you became your worst nightmare and sworn enemy.
Doesn’t it concern you that you believed in yourself more when you were a child than now when you can actually work on achieving the things you wanted when you were a kid?
So caught up worrying about the opinions of others and the desire to fit in, that you forgot how to voice your own opinion. You even forgot how to form it. Their validation will not bring you joy or happiness. Maybe there will be a short-lasting rush of endorphin but it will wear out and you will isolate yourself again when the insecurities you are not willing to deal with creep up to mess with your head again.
You fought more than a decade of abuse, persevered in a situation that can break people, kicked and screamed your way through poverty and injustice only to have anxiety about leaving your apartment? Life, no matter how much the world tries to convince us otherwise, is not meant to be difficult. You do not need pain and suffering so that you could grow or feel like you have something to fight for, or better yet fight against.
From fight-or-flight life in violence, you entered peace and you don’t know how to live in it. If there isn’t a mountain to climb or monsters to defeat, you cannot find a meaning or the will to fight for yourself.
You can go to bed peacefully, there’s no fear, but you still use all three locks on the door, turn the key twice and also lock the door to your room. What are you trying to keep out? Nobody even knows you are alive up there since you do not move. You spend your days hiding behind a screen, in the corner of your couch, letting small pieces of yourself come out through writing and then you put the laptop down, put the phone down and have another night of restless sleep. It isn’t life.
You need to move. You really need to literally move and then move out of your own damn way. There is more to accomplish, there is more to be seen. You did not lose a part of your life, you just lived through a different experience than what you should have. Just because you were hiding bruises as a child, doesn’t mean you should spend the rest of your life hiding.
Your own two feet are still strong enough to carry you and everything you are dealing with. You just need to move today, move from where you are, step by step towards the person you tried to bury under a pile of insecurities and struggle. She is still out there, you just need to step into everything she has to offer. You need to step into everything you are capable of. Just move.
Sincerely,
Yourself.
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Well written. You are strong.
I loved reading this. So many of us feel this way. Stuck. You also gave yourself solid advice too. Wishing you all the best.
Please post the reply letter.
Luna, I don’t know if you wrote this yourself, but as one of your fans and followers, I can say this. You are a talented young lady. I can tell you are a hard worker, and you are so perceptive. You gave yourself good advice, tough but true. Go live life and enjoy. And know that you can take some enjoyment from the joy that you bring your followers. Wishing you all the best!
I love the way you write and express yourself. Simple and honest. Keep writing your heart, your innocence and your deep desire to seek the best that is waiting for you. Most of all I want to commend your pure heart, that sees beauty and brings it out for the whole world to see. Cheers to you and to all the future you, expressed in amazing words.
it’s seriously amazing
I love this so much!💗
I feel like this letter was addressed to me. I know how it feels to come out of a difficult situation into a more peaceful place, only to be unable to adapt to it. To remain in your house for days, weeks, because you’re unsure of where you fit in the world. I am walking this journey right now and learning it begins with you believing in yourself again. You will make it. Sending you healing.
I don’t know if you wrote this to yourself, but it’s quite relatable, especially the part about hiding bruises. I did move, and it did me a lot of good. I hope you did too!
Hope the credit card is healing!
Stay strong.
✨🙏🕉🌱🌿🌳🌻💚🕊☯🐉✨
Keep taking care of yourself for yourself, my friend. It is so worth it! 💕