Positivity Press #55 – HOW MY DOG HELPED ME CONNECT WITH MY NEIGHBORS

I’ve only spent about a year in the colony I’m currently living in and I usually greet and meet people that I know personally or through my family. Apart from that, I didn’t usually greet anyone I passed by.
I used to walk alone everyday in my colony in the evening and I didn’t communicate with anyone I passed by with. They weren’t interested in me and I wasn’t keen in annoying their daily routine. I like greeting everyone but when I see that the person I greet didn’t acknowledge me, I feel so embarrassed and weird as if it’s my fault or I should’ve spoken louder. So in a way, I was quite isolated from a large percentage of my colony.

However, when I got a dog and I’d take her out for a walk everyday, so many people noticed and acknowledged me (actually my dog). Children would jump around us excitedly, nervously call my dog and then run away when my dog responded, children and adults nervously tried to pet the dog, asked her name, what she ate, when I got her, etc. Even if the questions were about my dog, I was the one communicating with them and answering their questions. As days went by, they asked about me and I asked about them. Hence, I got to meet and listen to different kinds of people which I love to do. I love hearing about other people’s lives and their experiences, which I would probably never have experienced if I walked alone since my dog is a people-magnet.

I also started greeting other people like regular walkers, people walking their dogs, guards, etc. I also removed whatever litter I could from the ground, so my connection with people as well as my environment increased.

One day, I passed by an old lady who stopped me to say that my dog has such an adorable face. She called her granddaughter who ran excitedly to pet her. After petting her, she looked at me with a huge smile telling me my dog is so cute. The fact that the old lady was afraid of the dog and yet, didn’t stand far from it and let her granddaughter pet it showed her beautiful personality. Just because she was afraid of being touched by a dog, perhaps due to being told so when she was younger, didn’t mean that she had to make anyone else be afraid of it.

A lot of people aren’t afraid of cats but they are taught or conditioned to be afraid of dogs so every time I walk my dog, many people move aside from it or tell me to move it aside. I get it if they have allergies but otherwise, they are amongst Allah’s beautiful creatures which do not possess a shred of evil in them. I’d rather avoid certain types of people than animals, no matter how vicious and scary they looked, because people in their fear of animals tend to due brutal things to them just because they fear or are disgusted by them. Animals are much more peaceful and sane, and they just run away when they fear someone. Thus, when I observed that old lady admiring my dog, I felt a wave of comfort and peace in my heart from knowing that there are people in this world who try their level best to be kind to animals. It’s an obvious act of kindness and love but whenever I see it, it always looks beautiful.

The next day, yesterday, she invited me to her house and we talked for quite a while and I genuinely had a fun time talking to her, learning about her and her family’s life. There is perhaps no better joy than communicating with lovely, sane people.

So to answer your question, yes. I derived all this when I took my dog out for a walk.

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My name is Andale Seaworne. I’m a regular 20 year old Muslim Pakistani girl navigating through life, sharing knowledge and opinion related to different topics in life from basic moral values with relevance to Islamic teachings to travelling, books, food, personal experiences, observations, interpretations and anything that comes to my mind (in a series of bubbles).

Poem #232

I see you hiding in the shadows
of what they told you that you should be.

I can feel your heart break every time
they bend your will.

Step into the light, there’s nothing to hide.

The world always judged those
carrying change in their heart.

Positivity Press #48

Do you know the impact they really have?
We get so busy with life and everyone uses words all day along, for their whole life.
Some spoken
Some written
Some typed
Some sang
Some screamed
Some drawn
Some painted
Some hung
Some framed
Words
Just words or more?
Think about it
A simple “good morning” has the ability to brighten someone’s whole day
A “thank you” might be the one thing that encourages someone to keep going , when they feel like they have failed
A “thinking of you” could be the message that breaks weeks of silence for someone
A “are you ok” might be the one thing that opens a line of communication that a friend desperately needs
A “I hope you are doing well” could be the only encouraging words someone hears that day
A “I’m here for you” could safe a life
A “remember when” could produce a memory and laughter that replaces someones tears
A “congratulations” might be the response someone needed during their unspoken battles
A “I’m so happy for you” might produce the courage someone was having difficulty finding in themselves
A “I appreciate you” could have just lifted the spirit of someone suffering in silence
A “I love you” that isn’t done out of routine, but truly in the moment is the kind of thing that makes our heart sing
A “hi or hello” could be the only personal interaction someone has had in the years since their spouse passed away
I could go on forever but I’ll just say.
Hi
Hello
How are you
I appreciate you
I hope you are having a great day
I’m happy for you
Im here for you
And congratulations on your accomplishments today!

xoxo
♥️ me
Thebrokeninsideofme

https://thebrokeninsideofme.com/

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If you want to share positivity here at The Positivity Press send in your positive news with pics and the link to your blog (if you want) to postpositivity@gmail.com

Positivity Press #43 – Gratitude

 I’m so grateful to have supportive people around me. I don’t think we appreciate truly decent human beings until we don’t have any in our lives. I’ve only had two people in my life who were unconditionally loving and caring. A friend of mine pointed out that most of us think we love unconditionally, but we don’t. There always seems to be some little part – conscious or subconscious – that has reservations. So when we find someone who cares enough to step in (or out) when we need them – someone who’ll kindly tell us what we need to hear instead of what we want to hear so we can pull ourselves out of our own craziness, we’d better value that person. They are a rare human being.

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If you want to share positivity here at The Positivity Press send in your positive news with pics and the link to your blog (if you want) to postpositivity@gmail.com

Quote

I decided to end today with this quote. I really needed to read this today and maybe some of you needed this quote as well so I decided to share it. Lately, I have really had difficulties with controlling my reactions to… everything. I have just been so quick to snap. Anyways, I am tired. I am going to bed because I have to do this life thing all over again tomorrow but I hope with better control of my emotions.

Make sure to send in your submissions for The Poetry Bar, Positivity Press and #savingme. Also, this week we will be having a really exciting announcement about one of our Poetry Bar participants. Can’t wait to share it with all of you!

Goodnight!

Sending love and positive vibes,

Luna

Where do the feelings go? – repost

I am writing a poem about this and remembered how much I loved this little article I wrote so I decided to repost it. I hope you like it. 

Once the clocks on our hearts strike end and once a relationship has no meaning or function in our life where does it all go? Where do the feelings go?

I remember a certain “Sex and the City” episode in which Carry asks the same question and then says that it goes to their new girlfriends. I’ve often disagreed with Carrie’s outfits and I sometimes agreed with her theories but this one is an exception. I disagree.

The after part of a relationship has two possible outcomes.

The first one is the classic breakup we are all familiar with. You break up, start avoiding each other, start talking behind each other backs, go through mourning phases, text  each other, start again, fail, have rebound phases and so on. Here the feelings still exist but you don’t know how to get rid of them so you are trying every single thing except for dealing with them in a healthy way because let’s be honest the healthy way is the extinct and boring way. Mostly you just try to prove that you are great and that the breakup meant nothing to you.

The second outcome is the fabulous let’s stay friends outcome. It’s not fabulous. It’s an overture for a disaster. Where there are feelings there will be weakness and there will be benefits. All of that leads to a drama more tangled than Rapunzel’s hair which will only end up in a fight. The whole concept of staying friends with benefits with you ex is completely stupid. It’s like being allergic to peanuts and eating a Snickers every day – it makes no sense. I should know because I was stupid enough to do it twice.

One of you broke off the relationship which means that the other one will feel the need to compensate for being abandoned. That person is often prone to pretending they have no feelings, trying to hurt you on purpose, acting like they own the world when they are actually miserable. One of you two will also be honest and just go with the flow. That person will develop some kind of feelings which will end up in sadness or rage.

Rage is my thing. I think it’s positive as long as people know how to point it in the right direction and what is most important – rage will make you make your breakup final. No strings attached, no emotions, no anything. Pure rage pointed to getting your life back on track. You will notice his/her flaws, you will realize what didn’t work and you will sure as hell be sure that the breakup was the right choice and, sometimes, you will realize the whole thing was just a strike. You will be fine with it when you realize you can’t change the past.

My advice to you is that you need to end things when they aren’t working out anymore. The more you keep on trying to build something out of nothing, the bigger the disaster in the end will be. When you click the X on your laptop you want to close something so do it in real life too.

Choose yourself

Everyone is so afraid of loneliness that we rarely become aware of the fact that we are actually never alone. While endless thoughts are flying through your head, you are not alone. Loneliness comes creeping up when we lose a friend, our family’s support, when we are single or when we just don’t feel connected to other people. Because of this we often “drown” ourselves so much in other people and please everyone just to keep them around that we become unaware of the damage we are causing to ourselves.

The problem of loneliness isn’t in not having anyone, it’s in not being aware that we have ourselves.

First you have to establish a healthy connection to yourself. You will know when that happens because in that moment loneliness will no longer be a problem and the silence won’t feel so creepy. It’s good to choose yourself. It’s good to work on yourself. It’s good to become a bit introverted in order to find your inner peace.

Putting your own needs ahead of everything else isn’t selfish – it’s necessary! People who will turn their backs on you for doing so don’t have your best interest in heart. I am not trying to say that you should shut the world out and only give yourself all of your attention. Be there for your family and friends but also think about your needs, put yourself as a priority and stop neglecting your needs and dreams. As long as you are not happy you will never be able to fully integrate yourself in the world and that feeling of loneliness will keep on haunting you.

If you are a career oriented person, sometimes you will have to cancel a coffee date or a night out in order to rest and have enough time for your work or studies. There’s no need to feel bad or left out because of it and if your friends or boyfriend/girlfriend criticize you about it that means that your wellbeing isn’t so important for them. Don’t keep your goals and plans quiet. Explain to others why you do what you do and those who sincerely care about you will support you and find a way to understand you.

Every now and then find a night to close the doors on the world, be alone, turn off the internet and work on yourself and on your inner peace, to make clear plans about reaching your goals. Don’t always cater to other people’s need and ignore yours. You are just as important as other people and on your list of priorities you have to write with big capital letters “ME”!