Poem #268

You might think that breaking yourself
should be painful but it’s easy.
By the time I had to consciously decide
to break my will, my mind, my soul in pieces
I was already comfortably numb so I didn’t feel it.

It’s like flipping a switch,
closing and opening your eyes
to see the world from a new point of view.
I was now standing on the mutilated body
of the person I allowed myself to be.

I felt disdain for the corners of my own mind
in which I hid to get away from experiencing pain.
Oh, the fake lives I lived inside of my own head!
I only believed I was okay because I was emotionless
but there was that gut feeling that started taking over.

I choked up seeing myself in the mirror,
I wanted to burn the house down reading my old works,
I slept with the light on because I could hear the silence
I was driving myself insane and I knew then and there
crouched up in the little red corner that I had to break myself.


Latest Poem: Poem #381
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Latest Coffee Date: Complicit in my misery
Latest #savingme: Invalidating Trauma
Life updates: A Day spent in bed Involuntarily

7 thoughts on “Poem #268

  1. Allow yourself to release the pain, suffering and emotions. It builds your inner self stronger.

  2. To break or be broken.
    Break out of the facade of double faces
    And embrace the essence of being earnest.

    Thank you Luna for writing and for your visit and like to my piece ‘when’ on Dreams N Reality.

    It’s a pleasure reading you.

  3. Pingback: Poem #383 – LUNA

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